I am guiding a client to “last longer” today. That really means showing him techniques to have more choice about when he ejaculates and putting them into practice together through erotic massage. How do you learn the tango? You dance the tango with a tango teacher until you have muscle memory of your own.
One of my favorite things about this is that not only does he get practical skills he can use for the rest of his life, in the process he also gets a deeper relationship with his own body and sexuality. Lasting longer isn’t about disconnecting from the pleasurable feelings and thinking about the “shopping”. On the contrary, you can’t learn ejaculation choice without tuning into ones own body, including all the sexy, yumminess. The effect of this is to not only have more choice around ejaculation but to access a more fulfilling sexuality in general.