Sep 212014
 
Artemisia de vine

Artemisia de vine

I blurted this post out on facebook in the wee hours this morning.  A friend asked to forward it so here it is in sharable blog-form, all rough and raw like my heart…

Ah this familiar nut. How to gently guide new lovers into ways of being that are not modelled after male-arousal-system-centric porn? How to gently let them know that my arousal system just doesn’t work that way and that what they’ve been taught by example their whole life is only half the picture. That they are actually going to have to change from the base assumption up before they become the extraordinary lover I know they can be… Before my needs can truly be met… before their potential pleasure can be significantly and dramatically expanded too…

As a Conscious Sexuality practitioner and Escort I can guide them. They expect it. They seek me out precisely because I will lead them into lived experiences of engaging with their sexuality… and mine… from a much richer place. A place that truly gets female-bodied arousal and taps into far more of their own.

But how to gently guide a personal lover without falling into teacher/work mode and without crushing their ego? Afterall it’s not their fault. The information just hasn’t been available for them to learn in most cases! They are not selfish. They are glorious sexual beings following their delicious intuition and what they’ve been exposed to. Most of them are very eager to please me!

It is just that our whole culture hasn’t even had a language for the kind of sex that fulfils me. Female-bodied folk haven’t even known it about ourselves to ask for it! It’s been cruelly invisible and tucked away in the wordless places on a collective cultural level… Only catching glimpses of it but not truly, intentionally letting it pour on out in the gushing, rushing wonder that is possible.

The female-bodied arousal sexual model that really harnesses our full potential is new for us all. As is embodied mindful sexuality in general. Holistically connected sexuality… conscious sexuality…

It is just not as easy as asking new lovers for certain acts to be done a certain way. The whole damn sexual ideology has to shift in its foundations.

I know how to get there. I cannot be satisfied by the old sexual paradigm anymore. I have to guide my lovers there… but back to the old nut… working out how to show them without ruining everything… It is particularly tricky when I crave someone who can take the lead so I can let go but they are intimidated by my knowledge.

It is such a tricky fix.   Perhaps I am supposed to know the answer already but I don’t.  This unknowing gives me empathy for my lovers and their unknowing.

Artemisia profile pic 2014About the Author: Artemisia de Vine is a Sydney-based escort and conscious erotic arts practitioner who offers sessions that are a mixture of learning, playing and exploring sexuality.  She has two websites, one for those more enticed by the sensual end of the spectrum and one for those more wired to explore kink and BDSM.  You can join her mailing list or follow her on Twitter.

Sep 162014
 

Artemisia nude escort CEAIt gives me such a warm glow helping others explore their sexuality.  My client this afternoon was a middle-aged business man from Amercia.  He arrived at my door, straight from Sydney airport, nervous but keen to explore the erogenous potential of the male g-spot.  He had tried a few times before but had not achieved the pleasure he had read was possible from anal and prostate massage.  After reading why my anal massages are so popular he decided it was worth trying a booking with me.

Midway through the experience, all his shy reserve was gone and he was moaning and exclaiming, “This is incredible!  I’ve never felt anything like this before!”

At the end I asked him what his experience was like.  He replied, “I didn’t feel as though I had erogenous zones, I felt like I was one big erogenous zone!”  

My lovers bottomI asked if he had experienced anal orgasm before?  “No this was the first time.  I was felt it several times during that massage.  Incredible feeling!”

He also gave me the feedback, “This was a lot of money for me but  5 minutes in I had the sense that this was a sound investment.  You delivered exactly what you said you would on your website and in person.  You represent yourself accurately.  You listened to what I wanted and gave it to me.”

My style is quite different.  I see the sexual experience as so much more than physical acts and correct technique.  I aim  to facilitate an erotic journey inside my clients that takes into account their whole being.   I use a combination of techniques from sexological bodywork, tantra, lomilomi, Taoism and some I have invented myself from years of helping men explore their g-spots.   It is quite a unique session.

To read more about the types of scenarios possible  see my succulent array of erotic massages here.

Artemisia de Vine

Artemisia de Vine

About the Author:  Artemisia de Vine is a Sydney-based, plus-size Goddess with a greedy appreciation for the erotic arts from the sensual to perverse:  Escort, Erotic Massage Practitioner, BDSM specialist, Mistress, Switch and Spanko. See her websites for the  Sensual through to the Kinky (BDSM).  You can follow her on twitter or subscribe to her mailing list for erotic tips, tours and updates.

 

Feb 232014
 

 

Artemisia de Vine EM Prof logoHi, my name is Artemisia de Vine and I am a professional dominatrix, switch and domestic discipline spankee.   I also offer top shelf, exquisitely sensual, erotic massages and other types of intimate erotic sessions including conscious sexuality sessions.

This sometimes confuses people.  Those that want to be held and nurtured fear that my kinky side negates my ability to also be sensual and loving .  Those that are wired to want a dominatrix to take full, merciless control doubt my ability to pull that off if I also offer lush sensual sessions.

Sex and/or BDSM are not merely a set of acts but are rather a place we go inside ourselves and a journey into erotic consciousness we share together. 

Here’s the thing.  All of the above sessions are aiming to get to the same place.  In all the above scenarios we are aiming to build tension and then let go and fully open to our erotic experience…  To enter into that illusive but divine state of being that allows the “talking mind” to stop chattering… to be fully in the moment… embodied… exquisite surrender… washed over with sensations…

More important than any act performed, it’s a place within us we really crave to enter.  It’s primarily a state of consciousness.  Everything else is just a means to get us there.

This is one of the main reasons I chose to call myself a Conscious Erotic Arts Practitioner.  While the kinds of sessions I offer are broad, they all have one thing in common.

I am a specialist in Erotic States of Consciousness. 

We are all aiming for that mystical magical place within us whether we are aware of it or not.  Really at the heart of it we are searching for more than the physical release of an orgasm.  The truly mind-blowing erotic experiences include our whole being… mind, body, heart and that illusive thing many call soul…  They are mind blowing because of the state of consciousness our minds and bodies enter into.

However, each of us is wired uniquely so each person is going to need to explore a different way of getting there.   What interests me is working out the puzzle each client presents.  I thrive on working out what is going to be the best kind of play for them at this particular point in time.

For some it is an overty sexual or “horny” feeling and for others it is primarily about power play and release.  All of it falls under the category of eroticism to me as I use eroticism to mean “eros”… the creative life force that pumps through our veins and motivates us in all sorts of conscious and not so conscious ways.   The point is, each person is unique in how they access this within themselves.

 

Erotic play and meditation have a lot in common. 

Recently science has caught up with knowledge us kinksters have known for ages.  Kink is the new yoga.  It has all the benefits of meditating and exercising.  Kinksters often report feeling calm and blissful after play like their system has been re-booted.  They often report insights into themselves and a feeling of connectedness with themselves and others.

However, it is not just kink that can have that effect on us… It’s not just pain or power play… it’s sensual pleasure too… Tantra practitioners, Taoists and various other erotic esoteric traditions have been pointing to the potential sexuality has to access profound states of being for thousands of years.

Most of us stumble across the amazing potential sexuality has to access profound and sometimes life altering states of consciousness at some point.  Or we at least touch on it… and have a sense there is something more if only we could just get the right set of circumstances together…  Maybe we think we need to be in limerence (that fresh new honey moon in-loveness) in order to access it… Perhaps we are waiting for the right lover…

The truth is, while having a lover who is on the same page as you really helps, there are skills we can learn within ourselves that make the likelihood of reaching these ecstatic, erotic states far more likely, far more often, whether we are in a romantic relationship or not.   We really don’t need to rely on the temporary high of being newly in love to access this delicious and precious part of ourselves.

 

The conscious erotic arts are about intentionally cultivating these states of being within ourselves. 

The more aware we are about our own unique erotic wiring… the more we develop a deeper relationship with our inner workings… the more conscious we are about it… the further we can go into each experience.

This is not something I can do to someone any more than a tango teacher can do the tango to someone.  It is something that can be cultivated however. It also helps considerably to have an experienced play partner whose intention is to create all the right circumstances to enhance potential erotic states of being and experience.   It also helps to learn the steps from someone who has danced them many times…  Again like the experienced tango teacher…

My role is to guide people into the skills needed to cultivate this way of approaching our eroticism be it kinky or sensual.  My sessions include consultations to help each person work out their unique wiring.  Together we design a series of play sessions that allow that person to explore their holistic erotic potential in a way that compliments their individual journey.

For some that may be receiving a series of lush full being erotic massages that allow them to just lie back and receive while practicing the techniques I’ve taught them… to enter deeper erotic states of consciousness…  to let go, surrender the ego and soar…

For others this may be an intense power exchange session where I am a sadistic bitch from hell and they have no choice but to surrender to the moment…  sometimes this leads to state of consciousness kinksters call “subspace” where the sense of time passing is distorted as each moment becomes an eternity yet nothing at the same time… where the ego lets go… the chattering mind ceases.. often accompanied by ecstatic, heart opening bliss…

Are you seeing the common link here?  Surrender… letting go of the ego… letting a different, wiser part of ourselves take the drivers seat… A part of us that feel connected as though we are all One…

Like in meditation, the ego doesn’t like giving up the driver’s seat… it will trick us in any way it can to try to hold onto control.  Each person will need a different way of approaching their eroticism in order to flick that switch that allows them to let go.  Some need to feel super safe, held and nurtured while others like the illusion of another person in control forcing them to let go.  Sometimes we need to role play in whatever way is necessary to get something deep inside our unconscious to surrender.

When we do get to that state of being it is exquisite… for many it is a spiritual experience… utterly divine… and has all the same benefits as meditation or yoga only with the added benefit of arousal.  Can’t complain about that right!

The point is that when I take on these different roles, dominatrix, switch, spankee, sensual lover, massage practitioner… I am doing so after a thorough consultation process where we both agree to take on the role necessary to aid the person going on the erotic journey.

Does that mean that I am just acting?

Am I just pretending to be a sadistic bitch or a loving erotic nurturer or a bratty spankee?  Does that mean I am not a “real” Mistress?

No, it doesn’t.  All aspects I offer are naturally within me.  I only offer to play roles that are really part of me.  I am just really good at drawing on them at will.  Within me dwell the full spectrum of personality archetypes… in you too… it is a skill to learn how to draw on them at will and one that I am quite practiced at if I do say so myself ;)

 

This sounds great!  How do I learn these skills?

If you are interested in exploring how to do this, sign up to my mailing lists through the websites listed below to find out about upcoming workshops.  You may be particularly interested in my workshop on “Embracing Erotic Shadows through Role Play”.  Alternatively you can contact me to discuss a personalised series of sessions that allow you to explore you unique wiring.   One of sessions give you a good test taste of this potential but it really is a journey so those that opt to invest in their erotic self discovery and personal sexual development benefit most from a series of sessions.

Despite the common thread between all my sessions, those seeking sensual conscious sexuality and erotic massage sessions prefer not to be exposed to my darker kinky personalities… and vise versa.  To respect that, I have two different websites.  One is for those who wish to explore Conscious Kink and the other is for those who want to explore the more Sensual Conscious Erotic Arts.

However I personally don’t see a conflict.  Both sites represent the real me. I am  following my natural inclinations.  This  sometimes means engaging sensually and intimately and sometimes means explore my perverse power play lust… or sometimes just playing spanking games for the fun of it.  It’s all me.  When playing with another I search for the place where we naturally overlap and create a session within that space.

www.consciouseroticarts.com
www.consciouskink.com

Nov 142013
 

FanAs a whore, I don’t want to be treated as a pretty pet to pass the time with.  I choose to be seen as the skilled practitioner in her sexual power and beauty who is capable of taking clients on erotic journeys and experiences into themselves… giving them a chance to feel what it is like to be with a sexually empowered and embodied woman.

Many whores I know are fiercely fabulous, self-aware, connected sexual beings.   The thing is, we are so limited in where we can advertise and get our message out there…  The brothels and the adult services directories frame sex work in a way that is counter to the above implying we are there to simply physical vessels to pleasure submissively… that we are an item on the menu…  sets of physical features with polite customer service formulaic conversational styles.

I see us as more akin to tango teachers and expert dance partners… part counsellor, part companion, part playmate, part sex educator, part priestess to guide you into the erotic mysteries…  Someone with a skill to share and respect.  I see myself as a representative of the archetypal woman,  who knows how to help you explore you inner world through sexual play.

Self discovery… Play… Pleasure…Comfort…. Holistic connection with our whole beings through sexual energy… 

Some advertising sites have done a semi effective job of countering the image that we are merely physical bodies with submissive, pre-scripted phrases but they still don’t quite get it right.  It’s still a case of us having to present ourselves within a framework that assumes certain values and ways of being.   There is still internalized whorephobia and sexism coded into the framework that disadvantages clients and sexuality professionals alike.

Imagine how much would change if we re-framed that whole culture of representation.   What if we choose to think of a whore as a sexual life coach who you approach with respect because they are an expert in their field?  Or a holistic companion to engage with you on all levels?  Then perhaps you can consciously negotiate sexual power roles together… Maybe she or he is more than happy to be the sexual submissive on their knees to please and treat you like royalty… Maybe she or he prefers to be the one who takes the lead and guide you to pleasing them… Or guide you to discovering aspects of yourself you didn’t know were there… Either way is fine.  There is the world of difference in being a sexually submissive woman when that role is consciously negotiated compared to when it is just assumed that all female whores are sexually submissive and subservient.

I draw to me clients who think along those lines.  Many men truly adore women and are respectful, genuine clients who are delighted to discover what is possible down the erotic rabbit hole but the culture of industry itself  makes it hard for them too.  The way we frame sex work needs to change so we can all access juicier play.

Mar 172013
 

FanOne can listen to music while bopping around doing the chores and feel energised and pleasurable. It’s fun, good for you and healthy. However to consciously engage with music takes it to another level again. To give each note your full attention and feel each note fill and move your body, your emotions and indeed your whole being can take you to another world. You can become one with the music. Your mind stops chattering and your ego takes a back seat… You can more deeply connect with your authenticity, embodied wisdom and personal bliss.

One can apply this same principle to the full spectrum of erotic arts: from erotic massage to sex to BDSM and much more. I specialise in sessions and workshops that focus on the techniques to more deeply engage in our sexuality. Sex is already great. To learn techniques drawn from tantra, Taoism, sexological bodywork, mindfulness and body-mind therapies to more consciously engage with it, takes it to another level again. This doesn’t just apply to the “making love” style of erotic intimacy but to all aspects of our erotic wiring including those forbidden and completely politically incorrect fantasies and consensual power play games.

Sex, like emotion, is a primal force within us that has one foot in the conscious mind and one in the subconscious. It’s not about linear logic… It speaks a different language… the language of dreams. This can be scary. We’ve all encountered people who are in an aroused state of consciousness and yet they are being unconsciously driven by it rather than consciously engaging with it and it can feel really unpleasant and invasive.

We can engage with our anger consciously or let it control us like a bush fire… same with sexuality. This doesn’t lesson the pleasure, oh no! Conscious sexuality, without a doubt, magnifies all that we hold dear about our eroticism.

When BDSM and/or sex is engaged consciously, we access our most authentic personal expression and become fully present in each moment. Remarkable experiences can happen from this place. It is different from session to session depending on intent, unique erotic wiring of participants and the mood on the day. Outcomes can be any of the following:

* An experience of deeper, whole being, erotic pleasure
* Connecting and flowing in companionship and playfulness
* Healing
* Personal transformation
* Deeper intimacy
* A journey of self discovery
* Ecstatic states of consciousness

All workshops and sessions operate from a place of consent and respect with an intent to engage even more of our erotic potential. To achieve this we need trust and healthy boundaries. For this purpose there is a free consultation before each session to establish this.

So why have I used the word “conscious” instead of “spiritual”? Even though I identify as a spiritual sexual being, I think that sometimes people are put off by the spiritual language commonly used when talking about tantra.  I certainly don’t identify with a lot of the meaning placed on tantric experience by others. However I have found that the techniques and experiences themselves are potent and powerful no matter your worldview. It is relevant to people who identify as non spiritual and spiritual alike. All you need is a willingness to engage more consciously and fully with your unique erotic wiring and expression. If this appeals to you then these sessions are for you.

I see my work as an outpouring of passion that has stemmed from my own personal journey. My explorations and adventures have led to many insights and discoveries that have helped me to move beyond our cultural wide sex-shame epidemic and into a mind blowing and authentic relationship with my own eroticism. This passion has manifested in professionally facilitating and engaging with other people’s explorations in this arena. Primarily this includes taking one on one sessions as a Dominatrix (and occasional switch), Erotic bodyworker (massage), Somatic sex educator and Erotic ritualist. I also occasionally offer sessions as an Erotic Companion (private escort).

 For those interested in the conscious exploration of kink and BDSM, please see my other site, Conscious Kink, here.